I know, I know!

It's been ages since I updated the blog. Does everyone really wonder what's going on in the mind of me? Cause sometimes it's a tad crazy! :)

The kids are doing great! Reagan lost her third tooth this morning. It's been super loose for a couple of weeks now and for about a week she would go to bed and tell me that in the morning her tooth would come out. And finally this morning, she pushed on it with her tongue and said "look how loose it is!" and it was like at a 90 degree angle. I told her to just pull it and she pushed on it again with her tongue and out it popped. We put it in a baggie and she's awaiting the tooth fairy to visit tonight.

Her parent teacher conferences were a few weeks ago. She's doing really well and gets along with everyone. Her teacher told me that right now their reading level should be at a 1/2 and Reagan's is at an 11/12. So she's basically reading at the level of what a first grader should be reading in the middle of their year. She got a card in the mail and she read all of it except for two words. I just can't believe how grown up she is.

Ryan is great too. He can still be my button pusher, but sometimes I look at him and my heart just melts with how much love I feel for him. In our ward, there is a Spanish "section" (it's not a branch, but they do have their own sacrament meeting, but their kids join our primary). In Ryan's class, there is a kid named Diego. I don't think Diego knows much English. And from what I've picked up from Ryan, I think that Ryan thinks Diego is "THE" Diego...as in Dora's cousin. Ryan will say stuff like "Diego was in my class today! He was wearing his backpack, but he had on normal church clothes." Or "Diego was wearing a cool watch, but it didn't have any animal stuff on it." It cracks me up!

Ty is still my snuggle muffin. He is talking up a storm and usually is volume is set at LOUD! And he gets mad when he's shushed. "NO! I'm tryin to tell you somethin!" We are slowly potty training him. He'll wake up dry every other day or so and so I try to get him to pee on the potty. But sometimes he wants nothing of it. I don't want to force it, so it's no big deal. Today he said something about something flying out of his butt and I cracked up. So of course he and Ryan start making up stuff to say using the word butt and try to make it funny so that I'll laugh agian. They are boys for sure!

Before Easter the kids were talking about Jesus dying on the cross and Ryan pipes in and says something about when Jesus's head was cut off. I wondered where they heard that from and they told me that the neighbor girl had told them that. I quickly informed them that his head was not cut off. Then Ryan said that Jesus had nails all over his body. Again..from the neighbor girl. So we had a short little Easter lesson all while riding home from the store. They were asking good questions too, like about the crown of thorns and why he wore it. It's times like that where I feel like I'm doing an adequate job of teaching my children the gospel. I may not understand it all myself, but if I can share and teach the basics, then that's what I can do.

Bon has been busy with work. He was gone for a couple of weeks at the end of March. He took off last Thursday and had Good Friday off work and it was so nice to have him here for four days. We worked on building our square foot gardens and doing stuff around the house. He installed some floresent lighting in the garage too, that is really brightened up our mess. ;)

I've been doing pretty okay. I've become good friends with one of my neighbors. She moved here from MI and didn't know anyone here and our kids are great friends. We are often at each others houses. We had them over for Easter dinner. I helped her build a swingset in their backyard. She's someone that I've felt comfortable with from the beginning, which is hard for me to do. I was like that with my best friend Kendra and I'm glad that I have found someone here that I can talk to and get to know.

I've started therapy and go once every two weeks. I'm learning new ways to think about situations and I'm trying new ways to be myself. I have to teach myself how to get along with myself, basically. My inner critic and the part of me that we have labled "reserved" aren't very nice to me and aren't who I really am, so I am trying to change myself to find myself. My thoughts have been flooded lately with the upcoming anniversary of losing Logan. My next appt with my therapist is May 1, the day that he was birthed, and my assignment is to bring a couple of helium balloons in baby colors to the session. I'm really dreading that whole week. This loss has really been hard on me and I've been good to cover it up. But that is also something I need to change. I don't need to cover my grieving because that is who I am right now.

I've also been trying to lose weight. I joined a gym with a couple of freinds and we go two or three times a week. (I couldn't go when bon was out of town, so I haven't been as much) I worked hard this week on my body and I am so sore! The muscles that you use for sneezing and coughing are aching! My arms are sore. But I feel like I notice a change. And that's good for me to make me keep going. I've lost 4 pounds too, by watching what I eat and using Sparkpeople.com. I have about 30 more that I'd like to lose, but we'll see once summer comes around what I'll be doing then. I've just never been this heavy (except when pregnant, so that doesn't count) and I don't like how I look or feel.

So there's your blog update folks. Now that it took an hour to type out, I better hit the sack!