Tonight as the kids were trying to settle down for bed (man, this daylight savings time is KILLER!), I came downstairs to survey the mess. I looked around and saw dirty dishes all over the counters, piling out of the sink, the empty dishwasher just opened up and ready for business. I saw bookbags scattered on the floor, partnered with the shoes that carried them to and from school that day. I saw jackets laying lifeless, stretched from one room into the next. And I stood in the middle of it all and made a guttural noise and rubbed my eyes and face to prevent myself from breaking into tears. Bon asked what was wrong and I quickly said that life sucks sometimes. It's the same thing every day. Over and over. I dove into the dishes and scrubbed some of my frustrations out.
Then I felt so dumb. Of course it's the same thing every day! Would I rather live a life where I don't know where I'll be one day to the next? Would I rather live a life clean and tidy without my children or husband? A big fat NO!
So while I strive to have the picture perfect life, I understand that I will always have a pile or three of something, anything laying around waiting to find it's proper home. I will always find scissors anywhere else but where they belong. I will always know that I won't ever have the complete set of screwdrivers in one spot at one time. My floors will have crumbs, the walls will have fingerprints and it might even be a little gross around the toilet until I get a chance to clean. But that's okay. No one is eating off of any of those.
As long as I remember to always tell my kids that I love them. That I always give them my attention and praise. That they feel love and safety when they are with me. Those are the things that matter.